This is an episode from the SpongeBob magazine series.


SpongeBob: Marco!

Patrick: Polo!

SpongeBob: Marco!

Patrick: Polo!

SpongeBob: Marco!

Patrick: Polo!

SpongeBob: Polo!

Patrick: Mar--Hey! You cheated!

SpongeBob: Sorry, Patrick! I'll start again.

SpongeBob: Marco!

(Door slams on Patrick.)

Squidward: What is going on in here? It's Two O'Clock in the morning! You're keeping the whole neighborhood awake!

SpongeBob: But...

Squidward: Listen, SpongeBob--I need plenty of sleep for my dance recital tomorrow, so keep it QUIET!

SpongeBob: But...

Squidward: PROMISE me you won't make any noise til daylight!

SpongeBob: Okay.

SpongeBob: I promise, but it's kinda hard to play this game quietly!

Squidward: Then play some OTHER game! Just keep it QUIET!

(Squidward slams the door and shows Patrick on the wall, flattened.

Patrick: Polo.

(Scene cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick with many noise making stuff.)

SpongeBob: Something quiet, huh? I don't know, Patrick--what do YOU want to do?

SpongeBob: Hmm...I've got it!

Patrick: What is all this stuff?

SpongeBob: I was saving it all for Halloween, but why wait? Let's suit up and keep the neighborhood quiet as...

SpongeBob: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy!

Patrick: Our favorite Super-Heroes!

SpongeBob: Listen, Barnacle Boy! That horrible noise! It must be the evil SNORELONN! And he's hiding right next door!

Patrick: What are we gonna do, Mermaid Man?

SpongeBob: We shall bring peace and quiet back to the neighborhood by capturing the evil Snorelonn! Here! Take your containment rod and follow me!

Patrick: What do we do after we capture him, Mermaid Man?

SpongeBob: One thing at a time, Barnacle Boy!

French Narrator: Inside....

SpongeBob: Before we confront Snorelonn, we should search the crime scene for incriminating evidence.

Patrick: This pie looks pretty incriminating! Chomp! Chomp!

SpongeBob: What's this?

SpongeBob: Our enemy is craftier than I thought! He'll probably try to stick this in your ear and suck your brains out of your SKULL!

'Patrick': I don't have any ears.

SpongeBob: You don't? How can you hear what I'm saying?

Patrick: What? I can't hear you.

SpongeBob: I said, "How can you hear what I'm saying?"

Patrick: What?

SpongeBob: HOW CAN YOU--Oh, forget it.

Patrick: Okay.

'SpongeBob: We must be cautious...rumor has it that Snorelonn likes to EAT his VICTIMS'!

SpongeBob: Wait--this book! It--it's HORRIBLE!This book..."gulp!" it''s...

SpongeBob and Patrick: IT'S A COOKBOOK! AAAAUGH!

French Narrator: Meanwhile, upstairs...

Squidward: What the--? Now,what's all this RACKET?

Squidward's Thoughts: If those two idiots have anything to do with this...

Squidward: Wha? (Squidward notices SpongeBob and Patrick.)

Squidward: Gasp!

Squidward: Who are you? What do you want?

Squidward: Help! Burglars! Thieves! Hooligans! Get out! Shoo!

SpongeBob: Jeepers! For someone who likes it quiet, he sure yells a lot!

Patrick: C'mon!

Squidward: Go on, SCAT! Aw, look what you did to my living room! You'll pay for this!

SpongeBob: Do you know any quiet games, Patrick?

Patrick: How about the "RUN HOME AND HIDE UNDER THE COVERS" Game?

Squidward: Hello? Police? I want to report a burglary! What? Sure, I can describe the bandits. It was dark, but they looked very familiar...

Police Fish#1: Uh-huh...Great big ears? Slippers? Okay. Giant nose, blue cape...Yep, sounds familiar, all right...You'd better come down and look at a lineup.

French Narrator: Soon...

Squidward: There they are! The BURGLARS!It was Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy! Shame on you!

Police Fish#2: Okay,you two! You're under arrest!

Johnny: And so it is that the mightiest defenders of Bikini Bottom bring their careers to a close under a cloud of shame!

Mermaid Man: Does this have anything to do with that tag I tore off of my mattress.

Barnacle Boy: Oh, pipe down, you old coot!

Squidward: Groan! I gotta get some sleep!

French Narrator: 5:12 AM.

Squidward: Ooohhhh......I've gotta...get some...sleep!

SpongeBob: Oh,my gosh! Patrick, look at the news-paper! I can't believe it--Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy--common criminals! We'll never play Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy again. I don't wanna be a bad guy.

Patrick: Now there's nothing left to do.

SpongeBob: Hey,look! The sun's coming up! It's daytime again! You know what that means!

Squidward: Aahhh....

SpongeBob: MARCO!

Patrick: POLO!

Squidward: Oh, what's the use?

SpongeBob: MARCO!

Patrick: POLO!

(Episode ends.)